Let’s be realistic I’m sure 99-99% of the population suffers from some type of anxiety, and that´s normal, in fact, it’s abnormal not to have it. When do I see the hottest girl in my Facebook Friends list post on tips for “those of us who suffer from anxiety” I go: “really? You are 10/10 on looks, are in a college that is 40 k per year, are full of friends, travel often, etc. You can’t really be serious. Anyway, I get that I’m being a little narrow-minded, but I hope you get the picture.
Anyone can have anxiety, but what about the type of anxiety?
It goes to show that anyone can have anxiety, but what about the type of anxiety, that is a real handicap. The one that doesn’t let you function like a “normal” individual and enjoy the before mentioned things, a happy social life, the one that doesn’t let you get out of bed, and convinces you there is no hope, the one that makes you isolate from your friends and family for weeks, doesn’t let you enjoy a stable working or college routine. What about that anxiety that has been there for 8 years and hasn’t gone away. The black cloud over your head, the one that doesn’t let you look at your peers in the eyes, or that makes it 6 months and you haven’t been able to say hi to a girl you see every day. Or the one that hasn’t let you engage in a loving relationship in over 10 years.
For the sake of the article let’s say they are 2 types of anxiety, the normal amount the one that is controllable, and the excessive. Let`s face it if you have the before mentioned symptoms you have a little more than normal anxiety you might have some serious issues that need to be looked at.
Conquering Anxiety with Spirituality.
If you’ve read this far you probably have guessed that the writer has at least some of the symptoms and for the sake of it here goes the solution.
Anxiety may come from identification with the ego. All my worries and fears are projections of my mind. Before you censor me with the “spiritual guru bullshit” card listen to me for a minute. The number one rule in spirituality is action. Talk is cheap my Darling, listen to a man who may or may not have OCD, Social anxiety, and how he copes. This is how I get by. I could have never done it alone.
Ask for help
The first suggestion is to pick up that 1000 pound phone and call someone for help, tell them what is happening to you, don’t ride it out alone. Thank God, I have a group of friends that are like brothers, I can literally call and tell them anything. I literally asked one the other day to come to smell my car because I thought there were “toxic fumes” in there ( an example of an irrational obsessive thought). Every time I would go in my car, I would have to breathe in discomfort because I thought it was leaking fumes. This level of honesty has helped me tremendously. I tell them my obsessions or repetitive thoughts and they tell me they are not true. Here´s the kick, they know they are helping themselves by helping me, that´s why they do it. There comes a point in the anxious cycle when you finally breathe relief and know that it has passed, that your troubles are a thing of the past, and that everything is going to be ok, but that moment sometimes can’t be achieved alone, that’s why sharing about the problem, is a nice way to cut it in half and to come back to reality. When I am in my own mind, I can be light years away from reality, but when I talk to someone else, that person brings me back to reality, I stop thinking so much about my problem.
Friends can make a world of difference
MY friends will stay the whole afternoon with me, while my brain circuits get straightened the right way, telling me that I’m okay, that nothing has happened. And here´s the kick again, in giving this to me, they grow themselves. If you suffer from anxiety you know that even though the thought might seem irrational, you need to be told nothing is wrong a hundred times if necessary for it to feel alright.
Taking more action is a great idea!
The second suggestion is more action. At first, I might need to talk to someone, but if I’m not in full-blown panic, and it’s a more manageable level of anxiety I can always help someone else. It’s not that hard, some people call it getting out of self. Look around, who do you think isn’t having the brightest day, ask that person how he is, offer a breath of fresh air into their lives, a Word of encouragement, a phrase of motivation, a piece of advice, you’ll thank me later. Thinking of somebody else, automatically gets me to stop thinking of myself and what´s wrong with me, and in many cases, that’s what anxiety is, and extreme obsession with oneself.
Honesty from others is necessary
Sometimes you need someone to tell you, bro, get your head out of your butt, you are fine, you have two arms, two eyes, you are young, capable, intelligent, go do something for someone else that isn’t as lucky as you. When you have anxiety you are trapped in the “me-me-me” zone, and don’t realize that there is more to this Universe than feeling “alright all the time”. Let’s face it, folks, we will only feel “great” maybe 10% of the time if we are lucky, the other 90% of the time we will oscillate between complete crap, so and so, decent, and could be better. But in reality, we are fine, we just want to always feel great and that’s not how it works.
Perhaps we are a little selfish
That’s why part of my theory, is that an anxious person like me is a selfish person, if I were self-less, and let´s say spiritually in a higher plane, I wouldn’t be so concerned with how I’d feel, I’d be more concerned about how I can make others experience in this world more pleasant and enjoyable. And there, ironically is the secret to beating anxiety, using that energy that I miss focus on myself, and worry about others.
I know that all these words can be empty when you are having an anxious crisis, cycle, or spiral, but you must bear with me and ride it out. Anxiety feels like crap but by focusing on the tools I gave you, you can cut it out. Other important tools are walking, any form of exercise, staying busy and productive so the mind doesn’t have time to wander, cutting down on the stimulants, meditation, etc.
There is always a solution
Living with a monkey mind isn’t always easy. But hey, there is a solution, so why suffer when you can be feeling good helping others? Over time you will see how being of service will restore your sanity and self-esteem Over time you will see how the Universe will provide what you need and let you feel okay and enjoy life.
Thank you for reading my story.