It has become easy to feel isolated from others as if you do not belong to any social group, despite the density of the world around you. Things To Do When Your lonely And Bored
If you often feel lonely, know that you are not the only person, a large number of people feel lonely more than ever.
To overcome feelings of loneliness, you must be aware of the nature of your emotions, understand yourself well, and be ready to make radical changes in your life.
The feeling of loneliness is a condition of the need for deep and not superficial communication, and it is a psychological state that has nothing to do with the survival of the lonely person.
A study published in the British newspaper The Independent last January indicated that young people feel lonely more than adults, as a person from every 4 between the ages of 18 and 30 says he feels lonely.
What are the reasons that lead to falling into the clutches of loneliness? What are the physical, psychological and mental risks that could result from loneliness and life-threatening? Are there solutions to avoid or recover from loneliness?
What causes loneliness?
1) Silence: The wall of silence that we build around ourselves can make it difficult for us to understand ourselves and encourage us to be isolated. There is no one to talk to, and no one to turn to, which promotes a sense of loneliness.
2) Exclusion and sadness: What happens when personal identity conflicts with society are that the ability to communicate decreases, and the feeling of exclusion, lack of interest and hidden sadness that deepens the state of unity increases.
3) Alienation: According to the Mind Foundation for Mental Health, one of the reasons for feeling lonely, despite the fact that the person is surrounded by people, is that he feels that someone does not understand or care about him, which deepens his feeling of alienation.
4) Shock: Shocks resulting from sexual, physical or emotional abuse or practical failure can lead to a lack of confidence in people and avoid deep relationships with them, and thus a feeling of loneliness.
5) Technology: Preferring to watch TV, or the length of time on social media, as well as excessive electronic gaming, are all reasons to feel lonely.
6) Pornography addiction: The more one is involved in pursuing pornography, the more lonely it becomes.
7) Absence of social relationships: The Mind Foundation for Mental Health has confirmed that one of the reasons for feeling lonely is that a person does not have social relationships. Research also showed that the harm of lack of social relations is equal to the harm of smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
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How loneliness Affects Physical And Mental Health?
Feeling lonely is not to be underestimated, as it may have health damages to the point of death:
1) The threat of the immune system: A study by Dr. Steve Cole, University of California, suggests that loneliness can threaten the immune system and stimulate genes responsible for causing inflammation in the body.
2) Increased vulnerability to colds and influenza: A study was conducted in 2017 of 159 people, and it was found that people who feel lonely are 39% more likely to catch colds.
3) Cardiovascular problems: In a 2016 study of 181,000 people, it was found that the unit increased the incidence of stroke by 32% and the incidence of heart disease by 29%, as well as increase the incidence of diseases affecting the heart such as obesity and blood pressure.
4) Anxiety and Depression: Feeling lonely increases the risk of anxiety and depression by 3 times. In a study dating back to 2006, it was found that high levels of loneliness are associated with an increased risk of depression.
5) Unhealthy lifestyle: A study found that loneliness may cause unhealthy lifestyles, including poor nutrition, lack of physical activity, smoking, and lack of exercise, in addition to feeling tired and suffering from food and sleep disorders, and losing or increasing weight.
6) Impact on mental health: A study conducted by Dr. Ann Vengard Christensen, from the University of Copenhagen, confirmed that “loneliness is a strong indication of worse mental health in both men and women.” It makes stress more difficult, and it reinforces aggressive behavior and a sense of fear.
7) Premature death: In a study of 3.4 million people, it was established that the unit increased the risk of premature death by 30%, said Dr. Julian Holt Lunstad, from Brigham Young University, “There is strong evidence that loneliness greatly increases the risk of premature deaths”
What should I do if I Am Bored And Lonely?
Things To Do When You’re Lonely And Bored
Anyone can feel the pain of loneliness; Things to Do When You’re Feeling Lonely
1) Talking to friends and family: A study concluded that social ties and meeting friends and family not only reduce the risks of loneliness but also help to recover from them.
2) Practicing favorite hobbies and interests: by joining clubs that organize social activities and constitute a way to get to know people and create social relationships.
3) Volunteering: It may be beneficial for what gives it a sense of the value and benefit it provides, according to a study published by the British Guardian saying that volunteering two hours a week reduces the feeling of loneliness.
4) Reducing spending time on social media: Melissa Hunt, of the University of Pennsylvania, measured the use of social media to students between the ages of 18 and 22, and stressed that “less than usual use leads to a significant decrease in loneliness”.
5) Changing the way of thinking: Studies have also demonstrated that changing the way of thinking may be essential in dealing with loneliness by stopping exaggerating negative thinking and focusing on positive things.
6) Enjoying time: Enjoying time is no less important than social activity, so occupy your time with your hobbies and interests and the pleasure that these things provide you, and do not link your happiness with others.
7) Having a pet: Having a pet in your life may humanize your loneliness, and help reduce the risk of early death, especially among those who live alone, because they are most at risk of feeling deadly lonely.
Accept your feelings.
There is no point in suppressing your feelings and masking how you feel. What you need to understand is that your negative feelings are an integral part of you. Accept what your coexistence and personality are like, don’t waste your energy to avoid anything. That is why you should always let your feelings flow freely and you must accept them with open arms.
Do something creative.
When referring to creativity, it is intended to do simple activities such as drawing, dancing, or sewing. You only need to do an activity that saves you from thinking about loneliness and charges you with positive energy.
Physical exercise can create miracles for your physical and mental health. Exercise is a powerful unit warrior because it helps your body release endorphins, a chemical in your brain that makes you feel relaxed and energetic.
Stay away from negativity.
If you want to overcome loneliness, you should distance yourself from the people who contribute to it. There is no point in expecting support and love from people who feel lonely. What you have to do is direct your interest in a group that shares the same hobbies.
Craft clubs, reading and yoga are among the best groups you can join. Interacting with people and participating in weekly meetings and motivational activities help you overcome loneliness more easily.
Make your expectations realistic.
Setting reasonable expectations when meeting new people is a healthy and effective way to avoid being let down. Don’t expect someone to open up and share their life story with you just after meeting with them twice. And if you don’t create realistic expectations, you can easily antagonize others.
For example, in your eyes, your close friend, who is busy all the time, becomes selfish or unworthy of your friendship. To avoid this, be sure not to place exaggerated expectations about people.
Feeling alone does not mean that you are alone.
Losing a family member or friend, or meeting an old friend and recovering bad memories raises feelings of loneliness and makes you think you are alone. But what you need to remember is that just because you suffer from feelings of loneliness, this does not mean that you are alone in the world and that you are not surrounded by people who really love you and care for you.
Never blame yourself.
Blaming yourself makes you feel bad for yourself. What you need to understand is that each of us has a different life and feels lonely because of a variety of circumstances, so there is no point in comparing yourself to others or blaming yourself.
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Support and care for others.
In this era, we have become so immersed in our own problems that we forget others and unintentionally ignore them.
If you show more interest in other people’s problems, you will see that feelings of loneliness are common to many people. So your focus on someone else’s feelings of loneliness and having an open and deep conversation with him will be beneficial for both of you.
Get rid of self-deprecation.
Feeling alone makes you see things from a negative perspective. For example, if a friend doesn’t send you a text message, you can easily think that he hates you. What you need to know is that feelings of loneliness can easily turn into discontent with good friends and even your family members.
So you have to spend more time with people close to you and have an honest conversation with them. And do not hesitate to visit your relatives once or twice every month, share healthy activities that remind you of the good things around you.
The feeling of loneliness evolves easily, and you lose confidence. And when you suffer from this feeling, you will inevitably begin to question the sincerity of the love of your loved ones. And moments of doubt can turn into a state of insecurity and even anxiety, making you want to stay away from everyone around you.
To avoid this, be aware of your worth and treat yourself as if you deserve more. Always remind yourself that others love you in all your situations.